what belongs where according to Aaron

Today we were informed that:

Legs belong to pants.
Moon belongs to night.
Milk belongs to cereal.
Cereal belongs to bed.
and, most importantly,
Boys do not belong to the dumpster.

Courtesy of Aaron Mark Olheiser

even MORE chacha love

Q: Is Dick Cheney really a vampire?

A: No one knows for sure. Not even ChaCha, but I think he might be.

rawr and similar

Henry left his popsicle in the freezer at church/school and remembered it when he got home so I told him to go down and ask daddy to get it for him then I skyped daddy to let him know to let Henner in. A few minutes later Henry arrived breathless with this tale:
"I heard the door open and I saw dad and I saw his foot and when daddy was going to give me the popcicle, he said he ate it but he was joking that he ate it because I could see it in his pocket so I grabbed it out then he tricked me of giving me a hug but he didn't really he just tried to get it then he started chasing me. Then I ran to the house and I didn't show it to daddy so he wouldn't get it. Yep, that's it"
I relayed it to daddy and he asked, "do you think that's the type of event he'll remember forever, like 'rawr'?" (rawr is a wrestling/chasing game my brother and sister and I used to play in, on, and around the living room furniture with my dad when we were children)
"I hope so," I replied, "I really hope so."
I really hope so.

happiness sense

Aaron: "I'm a good boy."
Me: "why are you a good boy?"
Aaron: "because I'm smart."
Me: "And why are you smart?"
Aaron: "Because I'm good."
Me: "Let me get this straight, you are smart because you're good and you are good because you're smart?"
Aaron: "yes."
Me: "That makes sense."
Aaron: "yes. That makes good happiness sense."

it's lurrrrve

Lizzy has a bag of pinto beans. She pilfered it from the pantry this morning. I saw her drop it once and although she was racing down the hall on turbo, she turned around for it. She loves her pinto beans. She raced into my office to tell me something (which I definitely understood, seeing as how I am fluent in both gibberish and squeaks) and after she completed her complete sentence (in gibberish, some squeaks) complete with nouns, verbs, proper nouns, and some misplaced pauses, she looked at me blankly. Based on her statement, I wasn't sure what I was supposed to say. She hadn't asked me a question... what should I do, what should I say? I resorted to the obvious: "You sure do love those pinto beans, don't you Lizzy?"
She looked at me solemnly.
Nodded.
"ahhhh... duh"

More ChaCha love

Q: My wife asked me to encourage her and I end up telling her that
marathon training is an idol and she is wasting childbearing years.
How do I always do that?
A: It sounds like you are just a jerk.

tastes like Canada

I made some chicken yesterday. It was good. I was telling my sister about how to make it. "I just took some chicken legs and I put olive oil on them and then some steak seasoning, some Montreal steak seasoning, and believe me I hate myself for getting Canadian steak seasoning..."
at this point she interrupted, "oh just admit you love Canada. Admit it's your favorite State..." [insert long pause while she realizes that Canada is not a state] "... in the Union"

Now she's insisting that she knew all along that Canadia is not a state. Sure.

Get some Montreal steak seasoning. it. is. amazing.