at about 12:00 AM Central Standard Time, I was alarmed to hear a strange noise in the living room. Thinking I had left my cell phone in my coat pocket or similar, I made my way out to investigate. Surprisingly, every light in the house was on. More surprisingly, I found a 3-year-old boy in a swim trunks, swim shirt, snow boots, and an Optimus Prime helmet. He was repeatedly pressing the button on the helmet that made it speak, thus the mysterious noise. "I am Optimus Prime," it said, over and over. I walked over to him, "what's up, Optimus Prime?"
"I'm Optimus Crime," he replied.
"It's time for bed, Optimus Crime."
We went downstairs. All the lights were on down there too. All the puzzles were dumped out of their boxes too. We cleaned them up. And I locked up Optimus Crime's helmet. Then I put my Baby Bear to bed. Again.
